In Episode 9, Slut Skills, we look at Hardy and Dossie’s suggested tools for successful relationships. Claire uncovers the philosophical assumptions implied in this chapter, and we suggest some additions to our metaphorical toolbelt – saying sorry, defining words, forgiveness of others, assuming the best. Finishing up, Sebastian sets us all some affirmation-themed homework, and we talk about shame and curiosity.
Show Notes Communication as a skill can be developed in many ways. An introduction to active listening and conscious talking is given here. The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate (1992) by Gary Chapman is available on Amazon here. Zarnitsyn, A. (2015). The Cognitive Value of Fiction in Thought Experiments in Personal Identity. The Journal of Aesthetic Education, 49(2), 62-81. is available here. Abuse is serious, real and there is support available. For an introduction to gaslighting please see this article by the National Domestic Violence Hotline. If you are affected by these, or fear someone you know is affected, please contact RAINN in the USA, and the National Domestic Violence Hotline in the UK. For those interested in the theories of causation and emotions, we invite you to read the introduction to theories of emotions available here. For an introduction into the role of shame in society, we invite you to read Nir, Bina (2018). The individual and society: the social role of shame in the Journal of Philosophical Criticism 1 (2):36-70. Available here. Coria-Avila, Genaro A et al. “The role of orgasm in the development and shaping of partner preferences.” Socioaffective neuroscience & psychology vol. 6 is available here. Season One of Poly Pages is reading Hardy, J. W., & Easton, D. (2017). The ethical slut: A practical guide to polyamory, open relationships and other freedoms in sex and love (3rd ed.). Berkeley, CA, CA: Ten Speed Press.
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